Madonna - "Celebration 2.0" with Lourdes!! (Lola!)

I'm in love with this video. Check out Madonna's daughter, Lola! She is GORGEOUS.

Boys? This is FOR YOU!! I think you'll like it better than seagull barettes. 

This one's for My Boys--and by "Boys", I mean "Gurrrls".

Lola looks darling!

Oh, Madonna. I would hate to think you're pimping out your darling daughter, Lola. But I truly have the feeling she was dying to dress up all "Like a Virgin"-like. Lord knows my boys wanna dress up like me. (Patrick? Ya hear me talkin' to ya?)

ANYgay.

via my homegirl AmyGrindhouse.com:

"There are mixed reports about this clip. According to our BFFs at WeArePopSlags, the above may not be the final promo, strictly speaking. According to their report, fans were disappointed by it and confused as to why a remix of the song had been used. A second video is expected somewhere in the next two weeks. That second promo will reportedly feature Lourdes, Madonna’s daughter, dressed like her mother from the Like a Virgin era.

Celebration will be available to download exclusively through the Apple iTunes store for free for the next 48 hours. Celebration is available for free download until September 3, 2009."

Download that shit up, y'all.

Britney's in on it, right?

Britney Spears - MTV Shows

Check out Russell Brand's Michael Jackson tattoo! Pretty sweet.

God, PLEASE let this year's VMA's be better than last year--please? Oh, and there's a rumor going around that the Queen of Pop will perform her new single "Celebration" at next month's Video Music Awards in New York City.

Those set to perform during the show, which takes place Sept. 13 at Radio City Music Hall, include Jay-Z, Lady Gaga, Pink, Taylor Swift, Green Day and Muse.

I suppose I'll watch, if not just to ogle Russell with my darling Annette (who's half a world away).

Madonna Loves the Gypsies!

Oh Madonna. Way to piss off the Romanians. Honestly. Madonna has been living in her own 5-star hotel of a life for so long that she just has no sense of reality. None.

"While onstage, the Material Girl told her views on discrimination in Eastern Europe, where anti-Gypsy (or Roma as they’re known there) behavior is common.

During the concert, Madge told 60,000 concertgoers her thoughts about how discrimination made her “very sad, especially because we don’t believe in discrimination against anyone.”

Despite the poor reaction, Madonna continued on - hoping to try and get through to the crowd, saying,”We believe in equal rights for everyone, right? Gypsies, homosexuals, people who are different; everyone is equal and should be treated with respect, OK? Let’s not forget that.”

While I appreciate Madonna's "can't we all just get along" sentiment, I wasn't confronted by gangs of homosexuals trying to steal my purse while in Europe...it was a gang of gypsies. What a ridiculous comparison she's making.

I'm offended on behalf of my Gays.

Tiny Snippet of Madonna's New Single, "CELEBRATION", Bitches!

Loving this...are you??

Oh, Boys??? I'm talkin' to you!

It's been confirmed: Madonna really IS a vampire.

Madonna! You look ridiculous!

WHATthegoddmanhell is Madonna wearing?? You can't tell me that she isn't going to live forever. This get-up proves her vampiring ways. Since WHEN does she cover up her girlie parts? Oh. See? Only when she ventures out of doooooors.

Hurry. Get her cloak and casket ready. Even Baby Jesus can't save her soul.

Baby Jesus doesn't appear to be un-dead.
Yet.

Happy Birthday, Madonna!

Oh, Madonna. Happy 51st birthday. Here are several of my favorite pictures of you--by my favorite photographer, the late Herb Ritts.








I might make fun of her sometimes, and I may not care for her plastic surgery...but we all age, don't we? Just know this: There will NEVER be another Madonna. Ever.

So that tranny or herm--whatever "it" is, can just sit down. (Ya'll know who I'm referring to, yes?)

Wow...Madonna AGAIN this week? "Celebration" is leaked!

I don't care for the word "leaked". It's just icky.

ANYgay, Madonna's new single "Celebration" has been um, disclosed without authorization.

Oh, and it's AWESOME.

Madonna - CELEBRATION, ya'll!

The Cover.

Two photos combined to make ONE.

I LOVE this one.

For once (?) I'm not bitching about Madonna. Here's the thing: I do LOVE her. Always have--always will. I'm just not digging her vein-y look these days. Creep. E. Remember the days of Madonna's voluptuousness? I pine for those days. "Vogue"? Come ON, Madge.

ANYgay. Sistergirl has a "best of" cd coming out called CELEBRATION.

Via OHLALA

"Here is our first look at the cover for “Celebration” created by street pop artist Mr. Brainwash who is best known for “throwing modern cultural icons into a blender and turning it up to eleven.” [source] We love it, it's very old school Madonna.

Mr. Brainwash, the creator of Madonna's "Celebration" album cover, started his career

in France as a documentary film maker to become later a popular street artist. He currently resides in L.A and where he is a well known graffiti artist. His "Celebration" cover reprises the classic Madonna shot by Jean-Baptiste Mondino that premiered on "Bazaar" magazine in 1990 blended with another iconic 1987 portrait by Alberto Tolot."

...the ultimate compilation of Madonna songs. The songs on “Celebration” have all been remastered and selected by Madonna and her fans. They cover the expanse of the Material Girl’s extraordinary career of hits including “Everybody,” “Express Yourself,” “Vogue” and “4 Minutes.”

“Celebration” will be available in a two-CD set as well as a single CD. There will also be a “Celebration” DVD released simultaneously which includes the video visionary’s best videos including several that have never before been available on DVD."

Are my gays happy?

Madonna Renames Tour: "Sinuey and Veiny"

What is THAT??

Madonna and one of her dancers
rehearsing for her tour.
It's strenuous, ya'll.

Show of hands? Who here thinks this looks sexy? Would anyone want to snuggle up to that? This is not what I want to see first thing on Monday morning.

Madonna!! LIVE in Manchester, Sweetie Darlings!!

My Darlings, Tim (L) and James (R) at the
airport lounge, where else?

EYE CONTACT, Bitches!

LOVE the spotlight!

Did Mum raid Lola's closet, boys?

AWESOME shot.

There is no point in changing ONE. SINGLE. WORD. of the email I received from Tim and James with their "review" (or worshiping at the House of Madge) after I called them out for not supplying their Editor with the appropriate info. So. Here we go, ya'll, In Their Own Words--Madonna Live--by The Boys:

"ok ok we get the hint after you scold us in your blog, lol.
ok first and foremost, she not only sang live, not once lip synced (ahem, Brit?) but sang on key all the while dancing to the most intricate choreographed steps. she payed homage to 80's Madonna with 'dress you up' 'into the groove' 'holiday' 'la isla bonita' and ' like a prayer' along with her currents songs from Hard Candy. Paul Oakenfeld opened for her, who is an amazing dj. THE BITCH MADE EYE CONTACT WITH ME 5 TIMES!!!! The world can end now, sigh.

Here are some pics, kinda blurry (thanks blackberry, but 2 you can see her look at me (if you look really close) ) and she was so gracious about people taking pictures of her as well. it was at the m.e.n arena (manchester evening news) the largest arena in e-land. the only incident that happened was a chain that was supposed to be secured to the lighting came off on one end and plonk, hit a fan on the head, almost knocked her out, and i was so jealous cause YOU KNOW she got to meet the bitch after that.

What else do you need to know to make us blog worthy? lol"

Oh, Darlings...you are indeed Blog-worthy!! I love you both!!! xoxo ~j

Photo credit: SUGARDADDY'S

Madonna Looks Like a Chick and Not a Tiny, Muscley Dude!

Mother Madonna, Baby Jesus and
The Prophets, Dolce and Gabbana.
Let us pray.

Oh, Madonna. I do love when you dress up fancy and look all purrrrty. I think it's sweet, too, that you had Mercy and David's nanny put some big boy duds on Baby Jesus. I don't even see any mac and cheese (organic??) spilled down his little suit. What a good little man.

Sigh. I know that's getting old. I can't help myself. One thing: Why does Madonna still wear a CROSS when she's not down with the Christians anymore? I suppose it's just like Britney wearin' her Star of David--she just likes the sparkly things.

My boys, Tim and James have just returned from a trip to Europe, which included FRONT ROW SEATS to see Madonna, aka The Gay Holy Grail. I'm still waiting for more details from my Loveys so I can share it all with ya'll!

Oh, BOYS??

Does Lourdes Ciccone Leon have scoliosis?

Lola has scoliosis?

That is most definitely a scoliosis brace she wearing. I've never even heard a whisper about Lola having the spine ailment, have you? I prefer to think that Madonna is simply making her wear this in lieu of nipping at Lola's heels and poking her in the back between her shoulder blades, barking "STOP SLOUCHING! STAND UP STRAIGHT".

One thing is certain: Lola is a lovely young lady. Beautiful.

The Ciccone (Ritchie?) Kids See Paris--the City.

Where's Mama?

Here are all of Madonna's kids, David, Rocco, Mercy and Lola wandering around Paris, while their mom is undoubtedly umm, rehearsing with Jesus.

I love how Lola is always rocking her shades and iPod. God, at that age, I would've done the same thing. She's got the typical tween "I don't know these people" distance from the rest of the fam. And by "fam", I mean boydguard and nanny--and those other three.

Oh, and Madonna? Michael did it first. FYI.

Michael Jackson, 1988

Madonna, 1989

Hmmmm. Even though Michael did it first, I prefer Madonna's "Express Yourself" video crotch grab.

I'm really scraping the bottom of the barrel right now, aren't I?

Lourdes Ciccone Leon has Braces!

OW! Braces on "Lola"!

Lola's wearing those boots again.
Wow. She's dangerously close to being called
"Stinkfoot 2"

Madonna's daughter Lourdes (Lola) is seen here trotting around London with a friend. I guess she didn't want the gap between her teeth like her mom has? I wonder if she bitches about how much they hurt? (I had two bitchy boys--well, ONE anyway--who totally bitched about their braces...but they were also thankful they got them.)

Lola is really going to be more beautiful the older she gets. Her mom and dad (Carlos Leon) really produced something wonderful. You never hear any bratty crap about Lola...and you know we would if she were misbehaving. Madonna is STRICT with her. I coulda been a little more strict with my kids, that's for sure.

Live and learn?

Madonna Picks Up Layaway Package Via FedEx Overnight at Heathrow!

How to obtain a child in Malawi!

Overnight shipping!
Is there a direct flight from

Malawi to London?

Madonna and her brood at

Hearthrow International.

(Are Lola's boots the ones from

"Desperately Seeking Susan"?

Mercy James (Cicconi?)

Where to even begin on this story, I don't know. Here it is in a nutshell: Madonna went baby shopping again. The shopkeeper said the little dolly Madonna coveted was not for sale. "Let me speak to the Manager--NOW!", Madonna was heard screeching at the poor, defenseless clerk. Madonna spoke sharply to everyone and laid down a few quid (?) for her babydoll.

Apparently, the Layaway Plan for The Babydoll (now capitalized--literally and figuratively), just how serious Madonna is about her purchase...almost everyone. The Babydoll's previous owner--HER FATHER--didn't have such kind words.

According to the Daily Mail:

"It has been reported that Madonna has just splashed out £25million on a Georgian-style townhouse in the Upper East Side.

The 26-room property is said to have 13 bedrooms and 14 bathrooms.
Instead of being raised in the Christian faith practised by her Malawian family, Mercy will be instructed in Kabbalah, the mystical faith followed by Madonna.

Rights groups have accused the government of giving Madonna special treatment and said the case would encourage foreign celebrities to think they can adopt Malawian children at will.

Mercy's father said Madonna, who is dating 22-year-old Brazilian model Jesus Luz should not be allowed to adopt Mercy.

'No one wants to listen to me, I have protested this all along... I want my child back but I don't know what to do now,' James Kambewa said.
'Madonna cannot take her away.'

There is little he can do now - the supreme court ruling cannot be challenged."

And that, my friends proves that Madonna will never, EVER take 'no' for an answer.

The End.

Madonna Finally Gets Mercy Off Layaway--Apparently Paid in Full!

This "painting" of Madonna should be hanging in
the Louvre any day now!

Seems Madonna put her big ticket-item, a four year old child named Mercy, on a layaway plan a few months back and has finally paid in full, so she's free to carry out her purchase in a grocery cart (read: private plane)! Times are tough all over, and apparently everyone needs the convenience of paying for more expensive purchases over time. Well, good for Madonna, and Mercy, and the country of Malawi (and certain relatives of Mercy--she's not an orphan), I suppose.

"According to Radar Online, a three-judge panel, headed by Malawi’s Chief Justice, Lovemore Munlo, said that the lower courts initial ruling was out of sync with the times. In addition to that, it is said that Madonna’s charitable history toward Malawi should have been taken into consideration.

This could not have been happier news for the pop superstar as it has been a long hard fight. But, not looking back, Madonna is said to be celebrating.

“It’s the wee hours of morning in New York but she is excited at the news,” her attorney, Alan Chinula said. “As her lawyer I am happy that this has settled this contentious issue.”

We'll being seeing Mercy, dressed completely in white, going to Kabbalah classes very soon.

Today's Blind Item: 80's and 90's Style!

Via CDaN:

So, for today I thought we would shoot back in time just a little. Not going to go back to Old Hollywood. We are just going back to those carefree days of the late 80's and early 90's. This A list female entertainer has had an amazing life. She has done just about everything possible in the entertainment world and is one of the most influential entertainers ever. Back in the day, our A lister had just gone through a very messy divorce. But, our actress had needs and loved, loved trolling the Lower East Side of Manhattan for Hispanic guys in her chauffeured driven limo. On one of her forays she found a 17 year old Hispanic guy and took him back to her place where she kept him for a few days until she grew tired of him. Well, it turns out that she gave this teenage boy the gift that keeps on giving. The Herp. Yep. Well, a few months later, our A lister was trolling the same neighborhood and people from the teenager's family recognized the car and before anyone could do anything all of his family pelted her car with trash from their garbage cans. Seems appropriate.

Wow. "Gonna dress you up in my herp....all over, all over". I love that song. I totally heard about this YEARS ago...a certain old blonde with lots of ambition used to creep around Alphabet City in a limo lookin' for Latin boys. I just never heard about the herp part of it. Figures. And I'm surprised that's all she's got. Ewww.

Sorry, Boys.

Oh, and Madonna's a Big, Fat, Clumsy Liar, Too.

Faker.

Obviously, Madonna can do no wrong in Madonna's eyes, so of course it wasn't HER fault that she tumbled off her horse again--it was the paparazzi who "startled" the horsey. Uh huh. According to TMZ:





"We spoke with the photog who tells us he shot Madonna before and after she fell -- but was not there for the actual fall. He tells us he took pics of her riding and then left. About 30 minutes later, he says he got a tip about an ambulance being sent out for a 50-year-old woman -- so he put two and two together and went back to snap pics of her being tended to.He says all his photos were taken from a public road and the only other photog around was Stephen Klein -- the famous photographer whose house Madonna was at.As Hinton put it, "If I had startled the horse, I would have gotten pictures!"





Precisely. Don't you think he woulda made BANK from those shots?? Come ON, Madonna. You're an old clod who has no bidness on a horse and we all know it.