Vanessa Hudgens Cannot Define "Irony".

Miss Hudgens, with Photoshopped undies

Heavy sigh. Oh, Vanessa. I love how you answered the question, "...and what is your hobby?" by some (inadvertently?) funny journalist:

“Probably photography; I think it's a lot of fun … savoring the moment.”

I wonder if this is really what you meant? Between those Cyrus girls and their stripper poles and you and your nakey phone photos, Disney is headed toward being the new Vivid Studios. Know'msayin'?

Oh, Kathy Griffin! And Other Teen Choice Awards Crap.

The perfect couple:
Kathy Griffin and Levi Johnston
at the Teen Choice Awards

I love Kathy Griffin...I've loved her before all of her plastic surgery and newly-sculpted body. Funny is FUNNY, ya'll.

So here's our girl, with her Big 'n Stupid date, Levi (I-Hate-My-Baby-Mama's-Mama) Johnston at the Teen Choice Awards, which air tonight on FOX. When asked about their "relationship", here's what the couple had to say:

“Long-distance relationships are not easy, especially when he’s in his igloo and I’m in my Hollywood tower.”

When asked what it was like to be Kathy’s date, Levi said “I just, you know, look at her, shut up and do what I’m told.”

Here are a few more pictures of some people I really could not care less about who also attended The Teen Choice Awards:

Sourpuss #1
Rob Pattinson from "Twilight"

Sourpuss #2
Kristin Stewart, from Twilight.
Both of them make me sick.

Kim (I'm-REALLY-JLo-Just-Look-at-My-Big-Ass-Lopez) Kardashian
Blonde??

OhforpitySAKE. HER again.
Nice wifebeater, black bra and heels.

GAAH! Kat von D, from "L.A. Ink"
Just who I would like my TEEN to emulate!

Another plastic surgery enthusiast: Fergie

...and of course, Britney, ya'll!

Wow. It's really saying something when Brit-Brit isn't the sluttiest one on the "green" carpet at an event.

Now I need to go rustle up a hot dish (or casserole, depending on where you live) for the Church Social tonight at 5:30 in the p.m. It's gonna be wild. I may even wear my open-toed shoes!

I think Vanessa Hudgens "leaked" (eww) her latest set of crappy nudie phone pictures. NSFW at ALL.

Oh, Vanessa.

via Dlisted (whom I LOVE!!!)

Heavy sigh. Here I am, writing about one of the "Disney Dorks", who are ALWAYS up to the no good. This little hussy, Vanessa Hudgens had nakey, nakey, eggs and bakey photos on the Intranets about 18 months ago. Or so I heard. Or saw. I didn't talk about it then, but I will now--begrudgingly.

Listen UP. I think she's auditioning. We all know that this little snip wants to be Kate Winslet showing her boobies all over the screen, right? She even recently said she'd go nude in a movie...she's just itching to dump her Disney image (I know, "image? What image might that be??").

Oh. How coincidental she's on Jimmy Kimmel tonight, ya'll. Come ON.

Anyway, these photos are obviously Not Safe For Work (NSFW). CLICK HERE to see something we really shouldn't be seeing, if you're so inclined.

Full. Body. Eyeroll.

I'm starting the rumor NOW: The Jonas Brothers are Plushie Lovers

That's right. The Purity Ring boys
prefer a different kind of love.

I'm breaking my own rules:

1.) Never, ever mention the goddamn Jonas Brother Dorks; and

B.) (Still funny.) Never, ever mention the goddamn nuts who are plushie lovers.

How-effing-ever. When the above-mentioned, non-mentioning topics combine, all bets are off. How dare those Purity Ring-wearing goons subject their perversions on innocent youngsters (notice I didn't just say "girls", wink wink nudge nudge). I just find it odd that all three Jonai have a "thing" for pigs. **Correction. I see one of them is a bear (hmmm) cop. Even weirder.**

Any plushie nuts (and I mean that in the nicest way) out there who can educate me on some of the intricacies of Plushie Love?

FYI: This is, arguably, the worst blog I've ever written. See what happens when I DO write about those ugly Disney Dorks??

Russell Brand to Host MTV VMAs for Second Year Straight

Russell Brand during his Comedy Central special

The Hollywood Reporter is well, REPORTING that Russell Brand will be hosting the VMAs again this coming September.

NEW YORK -- "Russell Brand will host the Video Music Awards for the second year in a row.

The live event will be held in New York on Sept. 13. It will be staged at different venues, including Radio City Music Hall, where the VMAs were broadcast in 2006.

Brand -- known for his deadpan, off-kilter humor -- hosted last year's show in Los Angeles."

I watched Russell's hosting of the awards show last year and was disappointed--mainly because the idiots in the audience (read: the so-called "stars" being honored) didn't get Russell at ALL. Crickets...no laughing, whatsoever. The Disney Dorks (particularly those "High School Musical" goons) were the worst. If you notice...I never speak of those fools here on Dipped in Cream. They are unworthy of a sidebar, let alone a full blog. Pssh.

Russell performed a special for Comedy Central several months after the VMAs. He acted out the bits that he had originaly written for the VMAs, but opted not to say, because the audience was so thick and humorless. It was hilarious. Voila`.



Maybe this year Russell won't hold back. Fingers crossed.