Monday, November 30, 2009

Today's Blind Item - Is this for REAL Edition

"As if this famous athlete doesn't have enough dang problems right now, you can add a couple more to the list. His wife knew that he had relied on a certain substance in the past to relieve his extreme bouts with performance anxiety.

However she did not know until a couple of days ago that he has been experimenting with other substances that could get flagged during testing. The second problem he has is his penchant for women who are paid handsomely to be discreet about their extra-curricular activities with him.

Word is that he likes to be punished for his bad behavior. He was subjected to harsh discipline from an early age, and he tells the women that he needs them to continue that tradition in order for him to be perfect. But don't expect either of these habits to come to the forefront in the coming months. Everyone is getting paid off to lie or to keep their trap shut."

via [Blind Gossip]

Oh boy. Is this really who it sounds like??

Sunday, November 29, 2009

I'm sick of the Tiger Woods Updates, we go.

Elin and Tiger when things were awesome

Really, Tiger?
via (again, y'all...)

"Sources tell TMZ the Florida Highway Patrol is now focusing on obtaining a search warrant -- allowing them to seize medical records from the hospital that treated Tiger Woods -- in an attempt to determine if the wounds Woods sustained are consistent with a car accident or domestic violence.

One big piece of evidence showing probable cause ... sources tell us Tiger's wife, Elin Nordegren told FHP troopers she went looking for Tiger in a golf cart, came upon the accident and then used a golf club to break the window to gain entry.

That's a very different story from what she first told Windemere cops shortly after the accident -- she never mentioned a golf cart. Nordegren told Windemere police she had walked out of her house, saw the crash, went back inside to get a golf club and returned to the vehicle."

Blah, blah, blah. 

What we have here is a case of money and power buying time. Ladies? If this had been you or me, we would be cooling our heels in a jail cell more than likely. 

Tiger's taking the blame for all of it, so the ugly stuff doesn't come out.

I'm getting tired of this story. 

Victoria Beckham's poor little feet! Bunion surgery!! OUCH.

Victoria's son Romeo is even giving
her the side-eye about those shoes.

Oh, Posh. Now I understand why you didn't call me last weekend when you were in Seattle for a day of shopping! Your little toes were hurting! You're forgiven, Love.

HolyLord, those shoes look dangerous.

via keepingyouinstiches:
The singer-turned-designer has told friends that her bunions are now so bad she is seriously considering having an operation to remove them.

The scale of Victoria’s painful bunion problem was laid bare recently when she was snapped in a pair of spiked Mulberry sandals. Now a friend of the former Spice Girl tells me: ‘Victoria has had enough of having bad feet and has made some early-stage enquiries about having her rather unpleasant bunions removed.

Am I the only one who thinks a French Pedi is creepy?

Listen. My girls out there (Cyndy, Holly, Cynthia, PATRICK!) have known me long enough to know it's still shocking to see me wearing ballet flats, but I do. I used to wear 4" stilettos to the grocery store, forpitysake. No. MORE. I gave away almost all of my high heels--most of them now belong to Dayna (see yesterday's Who Wore it Best -- those were mine.)

Even on my wedding day.

I denied til I was blue that my severe back problems had anything to do with wearing super-high heels for over 35 years. I still think the shoes were only part of the problem, but they sure didn't help. (See? Still in denial.) Of course, after I had surgery to repair my tailbone in 2006, I immediately went back to heels, but as of 2008, I wear them maybe 5-6 times a year. Why, I'll even to shopping in downtown Seattle in my flats. I know, right? Crazy!

I suspect we won't be seeing Victoria much in photos as she recovers from surgery. I know how she feels about her YSL 5" stilettos all too well. (Rumor has it she's not in favor of Louboutin's as much as she has been in the past, due to JLo's ghetto-ing up of the brand in her new song of the same name. I agree.)

Posh confessed:
“I just can’t concentrate in flats,” she told the U.K.’s GMTV on Thursday.

“I’d love to go to the gym,” she told the morning chat fest, “but I can’t get my head around the footwear.”

There is, however, an exception to her strict no-flats policy.

“When I’m at home with [husband David Beckham] and the kids, I’m always in a pair of flip flops,” she admitted. “He likes me without any makeup on – just looking really natural.”

Victoria, I'll love you just as much without your stilettos.

Tiger Woods UPDATE. Oh, BROTHER!

I'd actually like to see Elin's muscle.

All together now, "You spin me right round, Baby, right round..."--because here comes The Spin According to Tiger regarding the hot mess that happened early Friday night. Tiger took to his Official Website to let us all know that it ain't no big thang.

"Tiger wrote, “As you all know, I had a single-car accident earlier this week, and sustained some injuries. I have some cuts, bruising and right now I’m pretty sore. (Oh. Uh-huh.)

This situation is my fault, and it’s obviously embarrassing to my family and me. I’m human and I’m not perfect. I will certainly make sure this doesn’t happen again.” ("Hello, Zales? This is Tiger Woods...)

This is a private matter and I want to keep it that way. Although I understand there is curiosity, the many false, unfounded and malicious rumors that are currently circulating about my family and me are irresponsible.

The only person responsible for the accident is me. My wife, Elin, acted courageously (and like a wife who found out her man ALLEGEDLY hooked up with a 'ho) when she saw I was hurt (SNORT!) and in trouble. She was the first person to help me. Any other assertion is absolutely false.” (Oh. Okaaay.)

This incident has been stressful and very difficult for Elin, (you're goddamn right it has!) our family and me. I appreciate all the concern and well wishes that we have received. But, I would also ask for some understanding that my family and I deserve some privacy no matter how intrusive some people can be.”

Tiger? Come ON.

Jake Gyllenhaal and Reese Witherspoon Break Up! GASP! *UPDATE*

I'm soooo not surprised.

There are days when I feel writing about gossip is trite and meaningless. Today is one of them, considering the shocking and horrific murder of four local police officers. 

So. Jake and Reese are DONE. Big. Fat. Gay. Surprise.

I left this comment on another blogger's ( site:

OhforPITYSAKE, BB. You KNOW their relationship was all a sham. Reese was Jakey’s beard. It behooved her so that her little perfect name wasn’t dragged through the dirt (like Aniston’s) when her cheating husband dumped her ass. AND, it sorta (but not really) kept Jake’s gay rumors at bay. I read weeks ago about a couple who would be breaking up and using the “conflicting schedules” excuse.

That's all. 

Shooting in Lakewood, Washington - 4 Police Officers Ambushed and Killed

Det. Ed Troyer - Pierce County Sheriff's Dept.

Oh, God. Four Pierce County police officers were shot and killed this morning, "execution-style" in a Lakewood coffee shop. It's being reported that three officers were male and one was female. The officers were doing computer-work at The Cafe Forza Coffee Shop when they were ambushed and killed.


"Four so-far unidentified police officers were shot dead in a Parkland/Lakewood area coffee shop this morning, according to the Pierce County sheriff's office. Spokesperson Ed Troyer was not yet able to say which police agency the four were from, though it may be Lakewood.

"It was just a flat out ambush," Troyer said. "It appears they were doing paperwork and getting ready for their shift to start. The four of them are known by everybody here..." he said, referring to officers investigating the deaths. He asked for the public's help to identify the single suspect, who walked into the Forza Coffee shop at 11401 on South Steele Street near Parkland Sunday morning. "We have nothing to link this to the Seattle shooting," Troyer added at a press briefing, speaking about the recent Halloween night ambush killing of SPD Officer Tim Brenton."

A specific tip-line for this case has been set up at 866-977-2362.

The suspect is described to be a black male,  5'7" - 6', wearing a black coat, blue jeans. 

The suspect is still on the loose and is armed and extremely dangerous. 

Our prayers are with the officers' families. This is a horrific tragedy.

Saturday, November 28, 2009

A Kobe Special? Excuse me, Tiger...WHAT??

"How many carats will
buy your forgiveness?"

I really don't know how much of this is true, but man, does the whole Tiger Cheating/Elin Swinging get messier every hour. is reporting:

"During the phone conversation on Friday, Tiger told his friend, "I have to run to Zales (ZALES??? You have GOT to be kidding me!!) to get a 'Kobe Special.'" The person on the other end of the phone asked Tiger what a "Kobe Special" was. The reply -- "A house on a finger."

The "house on a finger" - 
Vanessa and Kobe Bryant showing off 
the 8 ct. $4M-I'm-Sorry-for-Cheating-Ring

During the conversation, Tiger said his wife had "gone ghetto" on him. (WHAT????? How 'bout Tiger went WHORING on her?)

As we first reported, Tiger told the friend his wife had scratched his face up during an argument over a report that the golf great had cheated on her. The "other woman" named in the story -- Rachel Uchitel -- calls the report "bulls**t." (Of course she does!!)

So. Will Tiger play on Monday?

Trailer to the precious film, "Babies" - Take a look!

Darling OVERLOAD...awwwwww!

Please take a second to watch the trailer to the film, "Babies", which follows four babies - one each from Tokyo, San Francisco, Namibia and Mongolia. The universal similarities and the cultural differences are just lovely to watch...particularly the similarities. Babies are babies, no matter where they are born and raised in so many respects. 

Absolutely precious. I can't wait to see these little babies...

Yet another scary picture of Miss Tom Cruise and Stinkfoot

Tom Cruise scares the living daylights out of me.

Here's our favorite Scientolo-nut with his daughter, Suri (I'm assuming she's not wearing tights or socks with her heels, but I don't have photographic proof), having a treat at Modern Pastry in NYC...a-bloody-gain.  I think they feed this child pastries for all three meals.

Does it appear Cruise-y had more plastic surgery, or is it just me?

Our Littlest Muscle Man...

How ridiculously cute is 
16 month old Felix?

 That profile looks mighty familiar...

My favorite snack.

Felix is the perfect
combination of Dayna and Alex...

but I'm totally biased. 

Thanks for putting up with my nepotism on Dipped in Cream. It's been awhile, and I thought it was time.

Who Wore it BEST?

Felix's Mama, Dayna, 
always paparazzi-ready


 Alex and Dayna hamming
it up for the camera, as usual.

Miss Kelly Osbourne

I just stumbled across this photo of Kelly Osbourne wearing the same Betsey Johnson dress that Dayna owns! Obviously, Dayna chose the more elegant black and white version, but who do you think wore it better?

I think you know MY choice. BOOM. Dayna, by a landslide!

Today's Guest Review (a little late, but it's cool anyway!) Dancing With The Stars!

 DWTS Reader Review

Hello Julia,

I have been quite flakey lately because I just got really exhausted with work and traveling. I am back for a bit. DWTS, was a blast!!!

Donny Osmond- should go home he is a showman, but it is truly a contest against his sister, Marie.
Marie, must have some pressure towards ET to keep her brother on DWTS.

Joanna, even her long blond locks and Barbie Doll figure could not keep her on the show. She had beautiful long lines, but would forget to point her toes.

Mya, is a trained dancer!!~ She would not win a 'Miss Congeniality Contest.'

Kelly Osborne, Can cry and dance. Well, what a multi-tasker. The crowd favorite as far as the one who has struggeled the most. She truly dances with her heart. It also helps having her parents at every dance performance. The one who will win on sheer determination and this will transform her life and give her a positive identity.

Okay, I do not have your talent. They would not let us take photo's inside they confiscated our phones and cameras. DARN!!!! DARN!!!!

Hugs & Love

We all know by now that StupidDonnyOsmond won. I heard he took LOTS of ballroom dancing lessons after Marie's stint on DWTS, in hopes of his own appearance. That kind of bugs me.

Nancy and Sandra
at Mr. Chow in Beverly Hills

I LOVE it when you guys send me reviews - and this one was fantastic!

Thanks, Sandra!! xoxo j

Another Tiger Woods Update - Elin Smacked Him Up a Bit

Here's one trophy that's not
mad at Tiger...

Our friends at are keeping us all up-to-date on the hot mess that transpired early yesterday between Tiger Woods and his wife, Elin.

And for those of you who think this should be "between Tiger and Elin", guess what? Tiger should know by now that he's a pretty famous guy. He really should be aware that behavior such as cheating on his wife is probably going to be made public and hence the shitstorm that is flying his way now.


Tiger Woods' wife, Elin Nordegren, changed the story she told the first officer on the scene, according to law enforcement sources.

The Windemere Police Department says Tiger's wife went outside, saw that her husband had struck a fire hydrant and a tree, and then went back inside the house for a golf club to use to try and extricate him from the vehicle. But we've learned Nordegren told a very different story to the Florida Highway Patrol, and it does not involve going back in the house for a club. Our sources will not allow us to be more specific.

And we've learned there was no blood found on the steering wheel of Tiger's SUV -- putting into serious doubt that Tiger sustained his injuries from the crash.

As we first reported, Tiger had a conversation with a friend yesterday, in which he said his wife had confronted him over reports he was involved with another woman ... and that his wife scratched his face up during the argument. Tiger told the friend he then left the house, started driving off and his wife then came out with a golf club, striking the vehicle. Tiger then became distracted and hit the hydrant and then a nearby tree.
Ya got all that?  

Friday, November 27, 2009

Elin Woods jerked a knot in Tiger's tail.

The "perfect" couple.

Well, well, well. It was obvious to me that something stunk to high heavens about this whole Tiger Woods mess today. The main sticking point was the time it all transpired--2:20 a.m. Ain't nobody up to anything good at that hour when a woman is wielding a golf club while the Mister is tryna take off in his Escalade after (ALLEGEDLY) fighting about his (ALLEGED) cheating. Yikes.

Elin might look like a tiny little Swedish swimsuit model, but it sounds like she can smack a Tiger UP when confronted with evidence of cheatin'. Tiger was found on the ground after the accident with Elin "hovering over him". Apparently, he had scratches, lacerations and blood in his mouth.


"Tiger has yet to be formally interviewed by the Florida Highway Patrol -- that should happen this afternoon. But we're told Tiger had a conversation Friday -- with a non-law enforcement type -- detailing what went down before his Escalade hit a fire hydrant.

We're told he said his wife had confronted him about reports that he was seeing another woman. The argument got heated and, according to our source, she scratched his face up. We're told it was then Woods beat a hasty retreat for his SUV -- but according to our source, Woods says his wife followed behind with a golf club. As Tiger drove away, she struck the vehicle several times with the club.

We're told Woods became "distracted," thought the vehicle was stopped, and looked to see what had happened. At that point the SUV hit the fire hydrant and then hit a tree.

We're also told Woods had said during the conversation Friday he had been taking prescription pain medication for an injury, which could explain why he seemed somewhat out of it at the scene."

I'm very disappointed in Tiger. (And trying not to smirk about the irony of being chased by his wife with a golf club.)

Definition of Irony: Camilla scolds Lady Gaga and Beyonce for "loss of values". Hello, Pot! My name is Duchess Kettle!

Camilla and Charles

Oh yes. He will be mine.

Saint Diana (as far as I'm concerned...

You have got to be bloody kidding me. The Horseface  Duchess of Cornwall (Camilla Parker Bowles, the longtime mistress and now wife of Prince Charles) is blabbing about what bad examples young women have in pop stars, Lady Gaga and Beyonce.


"She told an audience of women that  children thought they could get away with things because teachers failed to punish them. Referring to the images children are exposed to, the Duchess said: 'A lot of those videos are terrifying. I am sure they trigger a response in some of the young people. I can never understand how they can get away with making those things."


"Yesterday the Duchess made clear her concern that youngsters are already becoming immune to such images of sex and violence. She said schools needed to become involved in teaching both male and female schoolchildren 'the value of respect for each other'. 

During the discussions, the subject turned to a controversial video by pop singer Beyonce, who is particularly popular with young girls."

Let's refresh our memories, shall we?

All this crap is coming from the old gray mare woman who continued her affair with Prince Charles before, during and after Diana's marriage to the heir to the throne. Prince Charles even wore cuff links with intertwined C's on their wedding day. 

I'm not here to post a history lesson. I really just want to remind everyone that while Charles was still married to Diana, he gushed to Camilla that he wished he could "be her tampon".  I'd rather see Lady Gaga dressed as a tampon, thank you.


Oh, sorry. I forgot you were eating a turkey sandwich.


Tiger Woods seriously injured in car crash...**UPDATE - Tiger has been released from hospital**


Wow. This is weird. Tiger Woods was hurt in a very strange car accident early this morning. He was backing out of his own driveway at 2:25 in the a.m. Hmmmmm. Read on.

via The Orlando Sentinal:

"Professional golfer Tiger Woods was seriously injured in a car accident early this morning, the Florida Highway Patrol just reported.

Woods, 33, pulled out of his driveway in the Isleworth community about 2:25 a.m. when he struck a fire hydrant, and then drove into a tree at his neighbor's property, FHP reported.

Woods was transported to Health Central Hospital in Ocoee in serious condition, FHP said. No other information about his condition has been released.

A Health Central hospital employee said at 2:30 p.m. that Woods was not a patient. A hospital operator would not say if Woods had been treated and released."

FHP said the airbags in Woods' Cadillac Escalade did not deploy, which means the vehicle was traveling under 33 mph.

Orange County Fire Rescue received the call for aid at 2:28 a.m. Woods was transported from his Windermere-area neighborhood by the hospital's own ambulance."

Ummm, I'm tryna figure out how one can be "seriously injured" by backing into a fire hydrant and a tree at under 33 mph. Can someone help me out with this?

Oh, and here's some more strangeness--I'm hearing all kinds of rumors about Tiger cheating on his wife, Elin with some old blonde named Rachel Uchitel. When oh when will these GD athletes just keep it zipped??

I'm finding the news of Tiger's car accident and this bit of crap NON-coincidental in terms of timing. 

**UPDATE: Tiger has been released from the hospital...but I tell ya what; the trouble has only just begun. Mark my words, y'all.

Authorities are saying alcohol was "not a factor", but charges may be brought. Wow.

Thursday, November 26, 2009

President Obama thinks "Courage" the turkey would have been DELICIOUS. Happy Thanksgiving, Y'all!!

"I have to pardon a WHAT today??"

Oh, President Obama. 

I know our President is an "eye-roller", just by his sarcastic remarks about the whole "pardoning of a turkey" silliness that he was forced into. I can just see him moaning about having this spectacle. 

"Jaaayzus H., Michelle. Seriously? Is this actually Presidential behavior? GAAAH!"


"You know, there are certain days that remind me of why I ran for this office. And then there are moments like this -- (laughter) -- where I pardon a turkey and send it to Disneyland. (Laughter.)

I'm told Presidents Eisenhower and Johnson actually ate their turkeys," Obama said. "You can't fault them for that; that's a good-looking bird."
Obama joked about wanting to forgo the tradition and eat "Courage."
"Thanks to the interventions of Malia and Sasha — because I was planning to eat this sucker (HAHAHAHAAA!) — 'Courage' will also be spared this terrible and delicious fate," he said."

Oh, sure. President Obama went on to make the usual goodwill wishes toward our country, our brave and admireable troops overseas--but really, sometimes it's all about our President being a bit embarrassed and sarcastic while taking on the annual Turkey Pardoning.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

WARNING: LANGUAGE!! Utterly and completely INAPPROPRIATE for the Holidays...but SUPER-FUNNY. Kick the kids out of the room, y'all. For reals.

Larry David, Susie Essman and Jerry Seinfeld

I've laughed at Susie Essman since the early 90's when each and every cable channel had a stand-up show with a brick wall behind the comics and she was one of the chick comics I made an effort to look for in the TV Guide. I still quote parts of her old routines. I LOVE her.

I fully realize that posting this Funny or Die video is entirely inappropriate. But that would be me: Ms. Inappropriate.

Happy Thanksgiving!!! HA!

President Obama and First Lady Michelle Host State Dinner with Indian Prime Minister

 The Official Portrait

"Girl. You look hot". I know that look;
don't tell me I'm being disrespectful.

I'm just gonna put this out there: I think Michelle Obama will become the First Lady Icon, thus surpassing Jackie Kennedy Onasis. Sure, Mrs. Obama may have been inspired a bit my Jackie O., but she has taken the baton and run with it. Clearly, she's more than comfortable in the gorgeous gowns that are designed for her...

via HuffPo:

"Michelle Obama looked dazzling in a sleeveless gold dress and shawl as she and President Obama welcome Prime Minister Manmohan Singh and his wife Mrs. Gursharan Kaur for the first official state dinner on Tuesday night.

Mrs. Obama's dress was designed by Indian-American designer Naeem Khan."

But as presenting herself as a relaxed and approachable, as well as capable and dutiful,  First Lady, Michelle Obama is truly the one to be admired.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Oh, Courtney Love...GO ON TAKE EVERYTHING - on Facebook

Hold on to your effing we go.

Courtney Love left Twitter in a huff (nice choice of words) and is now taking her rage and nuttiness out of Facebook. Take a gander:
"IF something happens to me, NO my will is NOT at Greenberg Glusker, that will is FORGERY…i created a new one per lISA FERGUSONs attorney who cannot be FOUND but that needs altering as it has Edward in it and Norton doesn’t have a CLUE how evil his own BM is he wont fuck a future Senator/Film Actor but hell purposfully refinance Kim Cobains Property i bought her cash outright, for the 12th time using a phony address due to some fuck up on some Bogus “ART FORM OF THE CH 13” R TODD used, leavng KIM COBAINS PROPERTY REPOS…SESED< “you have an hour to get your things” wtf did Kim Cobain do to YOU… so its best to never tell let alone kiss and trell i m shcoked at myself i never kiss and tell unless im really mad at an ex for like LOSING 300,000$ of my kid hes supposed to be paternal abouts money, oh yeah Norton just LOST 300k.

...britneys dad molested her , imagine the father that molested you owning you for slavery while your forced to sing songs picked for thier sexual content every night, insane right? i have it on First had authority, and fight as hard as she is and does she still didnt pull that card, its a pride thing i can relate to, However they want to play dirty, lets go, Im SO not affraid of the little trolls who hit this when i was fucked up who are called lawyers. lets GO."

So everyone's stealing from Courtney, and she thinks Britney was molested by her dad. Yikes. That's a lawsuit waiting to happen, but really? Do they really wanna deal with her crazy ass in court? And why is she still bitching about Edward Norton?

By the way, Patrick and I were blasting Courtney's (well, Hole's) cd Live Through This on our way into the city today. Nothing beats singing (screaming?) "I'm Miss World, somebody kill me..." at the top of your lungs with your best friend.

Good times. Good times.

Funny or Die Gets Oprah- "Please Welcome JOHHHHHHHHN TRAVOLLLLLTAAAAA!"

In all fairness, Kathy Griffin was the first brave one to make fun of Oprah and her yelling of celebrity names. (John Travolta is her best example.) 


Oh, Kathy. You're not D-List in MY book, sister.

Today's Blind Item - WHAT Boob Job?? Edition

"This is the fourth time this actress has had her breasts done. The first time was supposed to be a simple enlargement. After kids she had them done a second time. While many women have breasts that don't match perfectly, hers were so lopsided that she had to wear an insert to even them out. The third time, the breasts were evenly sized, but looked rather cross-eyed if they weren't taped into position. Now they're perfect. But don't expect her to disclose any of this any time soon. She's had plenty of other plastic surgeries, and still denies, denies, denies she's ever had any work done."

[Blind Gossip]

Isn't there a certain Cougar (I hate that phrase and so does she, which is why I'm using it), who keeps INSISTING she's "never had any plastic surgery"? I believe I mentioned her just yesterday.

Monday, November 23, 2009

Lady Gaga on Leno Monday Night..."Bad Romance" - TREMENDOUS

When I heard that Lady Gaga would be on Jay Leno tonight, my first response was, "Oh. But is Leno on Leno tonight? Ugh.". I'm glad Stephen and I suffered though (parts) of StupidJayLeno to get to The Gaga. 

I'm coming right out with it again, but with FEELING. I love her. I get her vision of performance art and music. (I still don't care for her first single, Let's Dance), but all the rest? Great. And I ADORE Bad Romance.

I have to apologize again for being so late in hopping on the Lady Gaga bandwagon. I tried to no avail.

I have succumed to The Gaga...there's no turning back.

Demi Moore, Helena Christensen, Claudia Schiffer and Eva Hertzigova worship Photoshop!

Wow. There has been a LOT of chatter regarding Demi Moore's recent cover of W Magazine. Naturally, she says it's ALL dare the public insinuate that a bit of Photoshop may have been utilized to achieve the completely freakish image gracing the cover! I mean, really?

 The cover in question...

Demi's Twitter responses...

 Oh, DEAR. What. Have. We. HERE??
Source: I'm Not Obsessed via Pop Culture Madness

I have NEVER claimed to "live a perfect life", as that suck-up wrote to Demi regarding her cover shot. I just hate the lying about shit. Don't even tell me that "it's Pilates and eating right", "I've never had plastic surgery!" and "NO, that picture has not been Photoshopped!". Oh, knock it off. 

via I'

"...a link to Pop Culture Madness, a website that has side to side comparisons of Demi Moore's W Cover Shoot and Anja Rubik walking the runway. Looks... the same doesn't it?

What do you think? Did W superimpose Demi's face on Anja's body? Or is this image photoshopped as well? Unreal!"

And for your viewing pleasure, I have a few more examples of the wonders of Photoshop:

 Winter 2010 cover of
I-D Magazine
Oh. Okaaaay.

  I present to you, Helena...

 and Eva. Okay?? Where did her curves go?

The "real" photos of the gals above are current.

Now as a side-bar, I have a special place in my heart for Helena. She was one of Michael Hutchence's girlfriends and they made a gorgeous pair. (Sadface.)

See what I mean?

(Oh, and I do Photoshop photos of myself. I just admit it.) 

Just in case you've missed the freakout over Adam Lambert's AMA performance Sunday night...




So. Here are some photos from Adam Lambert's performance last night on the AMAs

The biggest reaction I felt during Adam's entire song was, "Wow. Someone's trying waaaay too hard." I don't remember the song itself. I only remember Adam stalking around the stage waving his arms around, Britney-style, while pretending to be tough and sexy. I didn't fall for it one bit. 

Now, Miss Adam is going on the record whining about "discrimination" and "women have been pushing the envelope on stage for years", presumably pointing to Madonna. Adam? You. Are. Not. Madonna. Nor, are you Lady Gaga. 

I'm bored.

Sunday, November 22, 2009

Adam Lambert Kissing, Grinding and Trying to Out-Do Lady Gaga on the AMAs **UPDATE**

Yeah, this is what everybody's gabbin' about: Adam Lambert kisses a dude, shoves his crotch into someone's face and screams that screech of his with his tongue out during the finale on the AMAs. (I know, it's the voice lessons that taught him that.)

It'll probably get cut from the west coast feed just like JLo's ass tumble was cut! ('Cause she'll cut a bitch.) 

So if Lambert's performance has been cut (still hasn't aired on the west coast) Adam told Rolling Stone Magazine he considers the cut to be discriminatory:

“It’s a shame because I think that there’s a double standard going on in the entertainment community right now,” Lambert tells RS backstage after the show at Los Angeles’ Nokia Theatre.

“Female performers have been doing this for years — pushing the envelope about sexuality — and the minute a man does it, everybody freaks out. We’re in 2009; it’s time to take risks, be a little more brave, time to open people’s eyes and if it offends them, then maybe I’m not for them.

My goal was not to piss people off, it was to promote freedom of expression and artistic freedom.”

I guess we'll see what happens.

Jennifer Lopez falls on her fat butt during the AMAs...and I LOVE it.

Does it get any better than that? A song called Louboutins and she totally eats it? (It's at the 2:40 mark.) And don't get me started on that ghetto entrance of hers. Just DON'T.

I like to think of JLo's ass-fall as a metaphor for what she considers her "career". 


Jaaayzus. Stinkfoot Suri is wearing BOOTS with a sleeveless NYC!


Isabella Cruise, her spoiled little sister, and The Step Mother, Katie

For Pete's sake. Earlier in the week, Stinkfoot Suri donned appropriate outerwear--FOR ONCE, but with bare legs and high heels. Now here she is, in a sleeveless frock, wearing Kermit-Green rubber boots (and matching handbag?) with no coat. I KNOW I'm beating the dead Cruise Horse.  Y'all should be used to it by now? WHERE is her GD coat???? Oh, and they are shopping in New York City, where the temperature is hovering around 45 degrees.

And why isn't CPS involved?

Twilight - New Moon is breakin' records up in here...

Rakin' it in

A fellow-blogger and Twitter friend from This is the A List had some funny stuff to say about her experience seeing Twilight - New Moon the other night. She saw sobbing girls and grown women dressed as Bella Swan. OhforpitySAKE.

As you can imagine, New Moon is full ON breaking box office records, regardless of crappy reviews. (Because we all know those sobbing girls and embarrassing moms are all seeing the film 7-10 times this weekend, right?) Here are some stats:

  • Debuted at around $72 million in 4024 theaters but results still coming in.
  • Breaks the record for Friday opening and single day sales ($67 million from The Dark Knight).
  • The Friday totals include the insanely high midnight screenings that brought in 26.27 million from 3514 theaters – this beats both The Dark Knight and the latest Harry Potter.
  • Tracking for a $125 opening weekend which is still under numbers for the third Pirates of the Caribbean, The Dark Knight or Spider-Man 3.
  • Last year’s Twilight brought in just under $70 million so this one is destroying it as well as expectations which had the movie likely getting close to Iron Man numbers around $100 million.
I am not in favor (thank you, Tim Gunn) of this movie beating The Dark Knight in any way, shape or form.

Saturday, November 21, 2009

Song of the Day! "I'm Your Man" by WHAM!

Ohman. This is still one of my favorite songs. I've seen George Michael three times in concert, the last was the summer of '08 for his "Farewell 25 Tour". Sure he was chub-chub and couldn't it all the high notes, but was still fantastic--and when he began this song, I was the dork calling her friends and family to hear it--particularly my son Alex who used to mime along with his friend Andrew--I know, how funny--to this song when he was in high school. Of course, their rendition was exaggerated and camp. Wait. So was the original.  

Alex SUCH an oddball; his iPod is full of Swedish death metal, along with Luther Vandross and WHAM! What the??

Anyway, you know you love "I'm Your Man" every bit as much as I do. So, DANCE!! 

I'm hearing whispers of Anderson Cooper replacing Regis, y'all.

Pssst. It would make DivaJulia's dream come TRUE!!

Who's with me on this? The question should be, who isn't?? OhdearLAWD, I'd be in heaven if the rumor of Andy replacing ancient Regis Philbin and joining Kelly Ripa for their morning show! (I may have started the rumor...)

Listen, CNN ratings are down people. I know Andy likes to pretend he's Mr. Hard News (ahem), but we all know what a snippy gossip he is--the ratings would be off the charts if he would just follow his heart and team up with Kelly. This gig would be much better for little Mr. Delicate, who caught the swine-flu, along with the sexy Dr. Sanjay Gupta the second they arrived in Afghanistan recently.

I want to see a show of hands of those in favor of seeing Anderson Cooper replace Reege!

Now if we can only get Justin Timberlake to join SNL for even just one season! Online petition, anyone?