"Twilight - New Moon" Premiere in Los Angeles!

 Robert Pattinson making some girl's LIFE.

 

 Oh.My.Goodness. Kristen Stewart looks PLEASANT.

And very pretty, I might add.

 

 More RPatz

 

 Dakota Fanning working that red carpet pose.

 

GASP! JOAN effing JETT, people!!

 

By now we all know that I've never read a single Twilight novel, nor have I seen the first film. I doubt, too, that I'll see the second installment, New Moon--because well, why would I?

Here are my thoughts on the L.A. premiere tonight. JOAN EFFING JETT was on the red carpet!! She was there obviously to support her girls, Kristen and Dakota who are in the Runaways film which I will see. (KStew plays Joan and Dakota is portraying  Cheri Curry--even though I thought Taylor Momsen should've been cast. The producers really should have asked me...but maybe Dakota will rock it, who knows?)

I'm also genuinely happy to see that Rob and Kristen aren't playing the sullen brats like they did during the first film's promotion tours. Remember this?

Yeah.

 

via Examiner.com

"Some big celebrities showed up for the premiere as well. Joan Jett is on hand, presumably to lend some support to Kristen Stewart and Dakota Fanning, who star in the upcoming biopic The Runaways (Stewart, as you likely already know, plays Jett). Rapper 50 Cent is there (who would have thought he liked Twilight?), as well as Jennifer Love Hewitt, Julianne Hough, and Rachel Lea from 'Glee.'

Even Richie Sambora is there with his daughter, who is probably quite thrilled that her father managed to get her there!"

I love a vampire film...maybe I should just hush up. If I had a daughter, she'd probably be all over this Twilight stuff...and I'd know everything about Edward Cullen and Bella Swan.

David Letterman's Wife Kicks Him O U T. Oh crap...here we go.

Dave and son Harry. 

(I have a sadface right now.)

Yeah. This BREAKING NEWS is coming as a big, fat NO SURPRISE. 

via TheEnquirer.com (I KNOW, hush up...)

Mired in a sex scandal, the 62-year-old Late Show host is now living in his luxury loft in lower Manhattan, while his wife and son stay at his mansion in New York's swank Westchester County.

"Dave admitted he's sleeping in the city after Regina let him have it. He took a few days off from the show so they could try to work things out," divulged an insider at his CBS show. "But if anything, he may have made the situation worse.

"Regina demanded that he tell the complete truth about what he did with the women, but Dave hemmed and hawed.

"Now he's moved out of the house. He said Regina told him to 'get out' and that's exactly what he did!"

You know what? I'm having trouble watching Dave these days. If anyone, we'll watch Conan. I am actually feeling cringe-y when I see Dave now. Wow.

Shame on you, Dave. You broke Regina's heart. You are breaking Harry's heart. And you've broken mine. 

Chris Brown? SHUT the eff UP.

CHRIS BROWN TALKS TO LARRY KING
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Goddamnit. Guess what, y'all? Chris Brown doesn't remember a THING about beating Rihanna to a bloody pulp. What??

Does this a-hole really think wearing a baby blue sweater and a dorky bow-tie will make us think he's just a misunderstood young man? ("Like, wow.")

We will have a hair-lighting ceremony tonight during Larry King. God knows, my hair will be on fire.

Perez Hilton is Wussy and Scaredy.

Wuss

The hateful and heartless, Perez Hilton

Good. I'm happy to hear that that wussy a-hole, Perez Hilton is all nervey and scaredy after his hateful remarks immediately following the news of Michael Jackson's passing. The website "The Gawker" has written a very funny, yet important blog about the idiot known as Perez Hilton:

Via The Gawker:

"Infamous gossip monger/dirtbag Perez Hilton has maybe had the worst week of his life. And it's beginning to show: Perez is blogging scared. Is this the end for him?

Perez (née Mario Lavandeira) got a literal slap upside the head by Will.I.Am's manager earlier this week, and a few figuratively slaps upside the head by celebrities who once willingly participated in his sadomasochistic, symbiotic celebrity-industrial complex for his poor handling of Michael Jackson's death. Because of both, Lavandeira's clearly shaken, and isn't doing too well.

The cracks in his mini-empire are beginning to show. Little of the trademark viciousness or salaciousness Perez typically attracts readers to his site with has been around lately..."

There is one particular celebrity blogger whom I find hilarious. It's Michael K. who writes "D-Listed". There isn't a day that goes by that I don't LITERALLY laugh out loud when reading this blog. I often wish I could be as funny and ridiculous as he is, but I can't compare our blogs. Mine goes from silly-mean in one post to personal and full of self-pity (or loathing, as the case may be), on the next blog. So, if you really want an alternative to that a-hole who's pictured above, please go to D-Listed. www.dlisted.com

In other words: BOYCOTT that hateful bitch's website.

Bacon Infused Vodka...ummmmm?

Really?

Mmmmm...Brunch.

Black Rock Spirits, a Seattle-based distiller, is releasing bacon-flavored vodka, artfully named "Bakon." The only place it's sold in town is Belltown Bistro (thus far).

Wait a second...maybe this is my chance to "eat" bacon again. I wonder how this would taste in one of Stephen's world-renowned Bloody Marys? (Seriously. He needs to patent his recipe. His gorgeous concoctions are a MEAL...and this would be the infused side dish!)

Hmmmm.

Dumbass Jamie Foxx Apologizes to Miley Cyrus on "The Tonight Show"...Psshhh, whatever.

Downlow Dumbass, Jamie Foxx decided that he has a movie to shill, so he had better apologize on the color television set for talking shit about a 16-year old Disney billionaire, named Miley Cyrus. DDJF's upcoming movie with Robert Downey, Jr. The Soloist looks like a maudlin piece of treacle and certainly doesn't need any more bad publicity than the crappy reviews that are forthcoming, so he dragged his sorry ass out to say this last night:

"I so apologize to [Cyrus], and this is sincere. I am a comedian, and you guys know that whatever I say, I don't mean any of it. [Big laugh from the audience]. And sometimes, as comedians, as we do, we go a little bit too far.

"I have a radio show…We're really the black Howard Stern. We go at everybody. There was a situation with Miley Cyrus, and I just want to say, I apologize for what I said. I didn't mean it maliciously. You know I'm a comedian. You know my heart.

"Miley, I apologize, so I'll call you. I got a daughter too, so I completely understand."

"Didn't mean it maliciously." Oh. Okaaay. Recommending that a 16-year old start up with some smack and do a sex tape is always just good fun in Jamie's book, I guess. (Oh, except for his kid.) My bad.

A-Rod: Details Magazine Photos - A Good Career Move?

A-Rod kissing...A-Rod.
"Steriods? What steroids?"

"Man, I'm purrrdy."

WHAT. THE. HELL? Alex Rodriguez has really gone and done it this time. He's in the latest issue of Details magazine, looking downright, well, homosexual. Ya'll know I love me some gays...and so does Madonna! Maybe we've been on the wrong track this entire time. He's askin' for a beatdown in the locker-room...from the gay boys that he's bashed in the past.

C'mon OUT, Mr. Rod.

Etta James Can Kick Beyonce` Knowles's Ass from her Hoveround.**UPDATE from 1/28 Original Post**Oh, Man. Second UPDATE - Etta Begins the Backpedalling

"Oh no you DITN'T say that 'bout me!"

"At Last" belongs to ETTA


"Shut the eff UP"...

Oh gurrrrrl. I KNEW it. (Again, see my previous post regarding the Legend Etta James being irritated about Beyonce` singing "At Last" to President Obama and his wife, Michelle for their first Inauguration dance!)

Two dear friends of mine saw Ms. Etta James at the Paramount Theatre in Seattle last night. She showed up onstage in a scooter-chair and proceeded to be the sassy, naughty broad they never really knew she was. When it was finally time to sing her classic "At Last" she told the audience, "there I was, watching my new President and his wife...dancing to MY song--by that BEYONCE`!"

She went on to make several more unflattering remarks about Ms. Knowles, which made it pretty clear...she could totally kick Beyonce's ass from that scooter chair. Babygirl better watch her big, um, backside.

Thanks, Holly!!

**UPDATE**

Here is a quote from an audio recording from Etta's performance at the Paramount Theatre in Seattle:

"I tell you that woman he had singing for him, singing my song, she gonna get her ass whupped," James told an audience at the Paramount Theatre, sarcastically calling her "The great Beyoncé."James didn't finish there."I can't stand Beyoncé," she spit out on an audio clip posted on Allhiphop.com, adding that Beyoncé "had no business ... singing my song that I been singing forever."

I'd pay cash money to see these two cat fight it out, wouldn't you? However, I expect plenty of backpedalling to come on Etta's part.

I KNEW IT. Etta James hopped on her Hoveround and backpedalled on her rant about Beyonce`.

The veteran chanteuse, who made headlines last week for telling a Seattle audience that she "can't stand" Beyoncé, said Thursday that she was purely joking—despite the fact that she feels she would have done a better job singing her signature tune, "At Last," to Barack and Michelle Obama at the Neighborhood Inaugural Ball.
"I didn't really mean anything," James told the New York Daily News of her onstage aside. "Even as a little child, I've always had that comedian kind of attitude...That's probably what went into it.

Yeah. Probably that and the fact the she meant every. Single. Word.

Oh Victoria Beckham.

This year's version
Last year's Crown Victoria

My former ideal of utter perfection tells Bazaar magazine in the January 2009 issue:

On always being in high heels: “Oh, c’mon, they’re not that hard to walk in…They’re not uncomfortable! You have to go to a sex shop to get this spray to polish them.”
On whether she personally went to the sex shop to buy the polish: “Oh. No…”
On her success in the fashion world: “I really had to prove myself, though…But now I feel like I am competing in an arena where I belong.”
On her routine: “It’s funny; I go to the gym now…I run four miles a day…I go into hair and makeup, and I turn into ‘Victoria Beckham.’ I’ll try on all my dresses, and I’ll pick out a handbag, and I’ll put on the shades. I instantly turn into this person, and it sort of feels like a character. And there are so many pictures of it…But it’s a true character because it’s still me.”
On occasionally letting herself go: “I run around the house in a tracksuit sometimes!…If I go to the supermarket looking like s—, that affects my work. I am selling an image. Plus, I have fun with it.”

After 30+ years of wearing 4 inch heels, I'm done. I love my black Uggs. (I did get the dog poo off from the other day, thanks.) All that outward flawlessness? WE don't get to "go into hair and make-up" like Victoria is so priviledged to have at her disposal. And, God. It's just so much WORK.

Last year at this time, I was kneeling at the alter of Victoria Beckham. We all know where I had to go six weeks later.

I still look at her. I admit it.

Chris Cornell...Belated Review?

I rarely backpedal. I'm doing it now--publically. While I did indeed enjoy the Timbaland/Chris Cornell concert last month, I didn't love it. (Except for Timbaland's cover of Nirvana's Smells Like Teen Spirit. THAT was the shit.) So. Chris Cornell. I do appreciate his efforts in trying something new...I really do, but I felt he was a bit screechy at times. I missed the soaring Cornell voice. I still think he can do R&B--just not hip-hop. I just really prefer my Chris Cornell rocky and and bluesy. I may buy the new cd (or just download it from Rhapsody), I'm still thinking about it.

I know you've heard American Idol's David Cook sing Chris Cornell's version of Michael Jackson's classic, Billie Jean (got that? Go re-read.), but I'll bet you haven't heard Chris doing it live. Do yourself a favor...this Voice is meant to sing like this.


Comments? I dare ya.