Smile and say "TRANNY!" Tyra Teaches Us How to Smile for the Camera!

If Tyra Banks tells me to "smile with your eyes" just one more time, I will scoop said eyes out with a melon baller.


Ugh. The New York Times felt the need to ask Mr. Banks (that's not a typo) for her vast array of "smiles".


The Flirting-With-a-Man Smile: “Turn your shoulder to your man, move your face down, and use a sound effect, a little hmmmmmmmmm."


The Surprise Smile: "We’re not smiling like the surprise is real — it’s not ‘OMG, are you serious?'" It’s a hand to the cheek, and a gasp. Remember, the surprise isn’t like, swine flu or an unexpected breakup; it’s more of a "I forgot my contacts at home!"

The Catalogue Smile: "Put the left foot forward, and turn your head ahead as if there’s wind whipping you that way, and smile with your hand on your head and parted teeth. So walk forward with your hand on your right cheek, and step with your left foot, so your booty sticks out."


The Angry Smile: Save this one for "bitches." You move a hand to your hip, look forward, "dip that booty to the right," and let your face say "Okay, okay, okay, uh-huh."

The Smile With the Eyes ©: “This is crucial… It’s on magazine covers, it sells perfume, it sells shoes." Tyra recommends pulling your shoulders down, facing forward, pretending there’s a string pulling your head up and that a dentist shot you in the mouth with Novocain. She said it’s “almost like you’re in Star Trek."


For your viewing pleasure:





Don't forget to smile with your HAIR, too.