Jon Gosselin grosses me OUT, man.

Ewwwwww.

Orangey McSideburn is totally making me gag. These weird and desperate women who are continually flocking around Papa Goose are making me sick too, so now I'm bedridden.

The very sight of that wife-beater slyly sticking out out of his carefully chosen douchey shirt and those goddamn sideburns...GAAAAH!! Seriously, the sideburns and the earrings get my wet, stinky goat (which I will gladly let him keep) more than anything else. Wasn't he the little dorky dad of eight kids with a screech of a wife that we sorta felt sorry for awhile back?

The "8" looked pretty miserable
back then even.

I'm doing my level best not to write too much about this a-hole. I didn't even mention how I thought Kate was TOTALLY FAKE-CRYING on the Today Show last week. (She was. I didn't see any real tears, did you?)

This whole situation is just a mess. Those 8 kids probably have it worse off right now than Michael Jackson's kids.